House rules

1. Treat each other with respect

   Be kind and honest, also when it doesn't click. "Not for me" is a fine answer.

   Example: if it doesn't fit, end the conversation or say so kindly, without putting someone down.

2. No intimidation or harassment

   Respect a no, and a silence too. Don't keep pushing, and don't look someone up outside FriendShaping if they don't want that.

   Example: someone stopped replying? Let it rest instead of messaging again and again.

3. No hate or discrimination

   Everyone is welcome, whatever their background, faith, orientation, age or disability.

   Example: jokes or remarks that belittle a group of people don't belong here.

4. Nothing sexual without the other wanting it

   FriendShaping is for friendship. Don't send sexual messages or images, and don't ask for them.

   Example: a remark about someone's looks that feels uncomfortable is already too much.

5. No asking for money or selling

   Never ask for money, gifts or bank details, and don't use FriendShaping to sell or recruit.

   Example: "Could you lend me 50 euros?" is never okay, even if the story sounds real.

6. Don't share anything of someone else without permission

   Don't share someone's messages, photos or details outside the conversation.

   Example: forwarding a screenshot of a conversation or posting someone's photo online is not allowed.

7. Adults only

   FriendShaping is for people aged 18 and over.

   Example: notice that someone is younger? Report it and we'll look at it straight away.

8. Meet safely the first times

   For the first meetings, choose a public place and let someone know where you are.

   Example: coffee in a busy café or a walk in a well-known park, not at someone's home.

9. Be yourself

   Use your own name, your own photo and honest answers. Don't pretend to be someone else.

   Example: using someone else's photo as your profile photo is not allowed.

What if someone doesn't stick to them?

• Report and block. With every suggestion and in every conversation you can report or block someone. Blocking works at once and the other isn't told. A report also blocks.
• A person looks at it. Every report is looked at by someone from FriendShaping, urgent ones (a threat, a minor, a crime) first.
• What can happen: nothing, a warning, a temporary restriction, a temporary suspension or, for something serious, removal of the account. We choose what fits.
• You always hear it. If you get a measure, we tell you which rule it concerns and why. You can object once. Whoever reported hears that we have looked at it.
• Report honestly. A report in good faith never has consequences for you, even if we see it differently. A knowingly false report can lead to closing your own account.
• In an emergency? Call 112. For non-urgent matters: police 0900-8844.

These rules are version 1. Later we'll improve them together with our members.